Staying Afloat

So, I suffer from depression.  I have since I was a teenager.  But it's gotten increasingly worse since the separation/divorce.  Now, when things are generally good, I find I still get depressed.  I realize that I'm experiencing this mid-life crisis thing at the ripe old age of 34.  So.  I feel like I'm drowning most days.  Such effort it takes to even get out of bed.  If it were just me, I wouldn't care.  But my depressed moods affect those closest to me.  My boyfriend, mostly.  I manage to put on a brave face for Raine.  I find I try harder with her because she's little and needs to see me happy.  But with my boyfriend, I unfortunately find myself feeling comfortable enough to just let go around him.  I figure he's stronger and can handle my moods.  But I'm so tired.  I can't remember the last time I felt normal.  So I'm beginning medication.  I need something to balance me, give me energy, the ability to feel motivated, etc.